Pee Wee Big Adventure You Dont Want to Know a Guy Like Me

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Pee-wee: There'southward a lotta things well-nigh me you don't know anything about, Dottie. Things you wouldn't understand. Things y'all couldn't empathize. Things you shouldn't empathise.

Dottie: I don't understand.

Pee-wee: You don't wanna get mixed up with a guy like me. I'm a loner, Dottie. A rebel. So long, Dott.

[Pee-wee has been picked up by a trucker]

Pee-wee: Some night, huh?

Large Marge: On this very nighttime, x years ago, along this same stretch of road in a dumbo fog just like this. I saw the worst blow I ever seen. In that location was this sound, like a garbage truck dropped off the Empire State Building...

[cutting to a few minutes later on]

Large Marge: And when they finally pulled the commuter's body from the twisted, burning wreck. It looked like this...!

[Turns to Pee-wee and makes grotesque face]

Pee-wee: Aaaaaahh!

Big Marge: Yes, Sir! The worst accident I ever seen.

Simone: Do you have any dreams?

Pee-wee: Yep, I'g all solitary. I'one thousand rolling a big doughnut and this serpent wearing a vest...

Simone: I know you're right, Pee-wee, only...

Pee-wee: But what? Everyone I know has a big "But...? C'mon, Simone, let's talk about *your* big "But".

Pee-wee: I wouldn't sell my bike for all the money in the world. Non for a hundred million, trillion, billion dollars!

Francis: Then you're crazy!

Pee-wee: I know you are but what am I?

Francis: You lot're a nerd!

Pee-wee: I know you are just what am I?

Francis: Y'all're an idiot!

Pee-wee: I know you are simply what am I?

Pee-wee,Francis: I know y'all are just what am I? I know yous are but what am I? I know you are but what am I? Pee-wee: Infinity!

Francis: No, I'thou not.

Pee-wee,Francis: You are! No way! Knock it off! Cutting it out!

Francis: Close upwardly, Pee-wee!

Pee-wee: Why don't y'all make me.

Francis: You make me!

Pee-wee: Because. I don't make monkeys, I simply train 'em.

Francis: Pee-wee listen to reason.

[Pee-Wee cuffs his hand around his ear in a listening motion]

Francis: Pee-wee!

Pee-wee: Sh! I'thou listening to reason.

Francis: Pee-wee!

Pee-wee: That's my name, don't wear information technology out.

Francis: Recollect the first time I saw your bike? You came riding past my firm and I came running out to tell you how much I liked information technology even way back then?

Pee-wee: I love that story.

[jumps on bicycle and pedals away]

Francis: Yous'll exist sad, Pee-wee Herman!

Biker #2: [the whole gang holds Pee-wee hostage] I say nosotros kill him!

Biker Gang: [shout] Yeah!

Biker #3: I say we hang him, *then* we impale him!

Biker Gang: [shout] Yeah!

Biker #4: I say we stomp him!

Biker Gang: [shout] Yeah!

Biker #4: So we tattoo him!

Biker Gang: [shout] Yes!

Biker #4: And then nosotros hang him...!

Biker Gang: [shout] Aye!'!

Biker #4: And so we impale him!

Biker Gang: [shout] YEAH!'!'!

Pee-wee: [tries to throw voice without moving lips] I say we permit him go.

Biker Gang: [shout] NO!'!'!

Biker Mama: [whistles] I say ya permit me have him first!

Biker Gang: [break out in raucous laughter]

[Dottie answers the phone]

Dottie: Hi?

Pee-wee: Howdy, Dottie, information technology's Pee-wee!

Dottie: Pee-wee? Where are you calling from?

Pee-wee: Texas!

Dottie: Huh?

Pee-wee: Honest! I'll testify it!

[singing]

Pee-wee: The stars at night are big and bright...

Passersby: [singing and clapping] ... deep in the heart of Texas!

Pee-wee: This box contains over 217 bits and pieces of data, evidence. Exhibit A: A photograph of the victims, my bicycle and me.

[Speck growls]

Pee-wee: Exhibit B: Another photograph. What'south missing from this picture? It's just me... WITHOUT MY Wheel!

[Amazing Larry whispers something to Mario]

Pee-wee: Is this something you tin share with the rest of u.s. Amazing Larry?

Astonishing Larry: Uh... no.

Pee-wee: Exhibit C: The horn I was picking upwardly at Chuck's Bikeorama when my wheel was really stolen!

[Honks the horn loudly scaring anybody]

Pee-wee: Showroom D: Jimmy what is this? Too late! Chip!

Bit: It looks like a pen.

Pee-wee: Exactly! I bought this pen exactly 1 hour before my bike was stolen. Why? What's the significance? I DON'T KNOW!

[Pee-Wee looks at Mickey'south hand as he is wearing one handcuff]

Pee-wee: What did you do?

Mickey: Well, I lost my temper and I took a knife and I uh-. Do you know those "Do Not Remove Under the Penalty of Police" labels they put on mattresses?

Pee-wee: Yep.

Mickey: Well I CUT one of them off!

Pee-wee: Jee.

Mickey: Yeah, I have a real bad atmosphere.

Pee-wee: Boy, I always thought that was the dumbest law.

[final lines]

Pee-wee: Come up on, Dottie. Let's become.

Dottie: Let'south go? Don't you wanna see the rest of the movie?

Pee-wee: I don't have to encounter information technology, Dottie. I lived it.

Biker #1: Did anybody tell you that this is the individual club of the Satan's Helpers?

Pee-wee: Nobody hipped me to that, dude.

Biker #1: Information technology's off-limits!

[Pee-wee is offering a $10,000 advantage to whoever finds his bike]

Dottie: Pee-wee, how are you ever going to pay a reward like that?

Pee-wee: It'due south elementary. Whoever returns the bicycle is manifestly the person who stole information technology. So they don't deserve whatsoever reward!

Pee-wee: Have a nice twenty-four hour period.

Large Marge: Be certain and tell 'em Big Marge sent ya! Heh heh heh heh heh!

Pee-wee: [falls off bike subsequently attempting tricks] I meant to practise that.

Mother Superior: Oh Rusty, you are an inspiration to usa all!

Pee-wee: I'll say! I'm going to start a paper route correct now.

Pee-wee: Aren't we gonna run into the basement?

Tina: [laughs] There's no basement at the Alamo!

Francis: Today'due south my birthday and my father says I tin have anything I want.

Pee-wee: Good for you and your father.

Francis: So guess what I desire.

Pee-wee: A new brain?

Francis: No. Your wheel!

Mr. Breakfast: Skillful morning, Pee-wee!

Pee-wee: Skilful morning, Mr. Breakfast!

Mr. Breakfast: Can I accept some Mr. T cereal?

Pee-wee: Okay!

[imitates Mr. T as he prepares his Mr. T cereal]

Pee-wee: I pity the poor fool who don't swallow my cereal!

Pee-wee: Is this something you lot'd like to share with the rest of us, Amazing Larry?

Madame Ruby: For xx dollars I can tell you a lot of things. For thirty dollars I tin tell you lot more than. And for fifty dollars I tin tell you lot *everything*.

Pee-wee: Tell me why I'thou here first.

Madame Cerise: You're here considering y'all... desire something!

Pee-wee Herman: [equally hotel desk clerk; in deep voice] Paging Mr. Herman! Mr. Herman, you lot have a phone call at the forepart desk!

[three hours into Pee-wee'due south long evidentiary meeting, Pee-wee shows a scale-model of the mall where his bike was stolen, with arrows pointing certain spots as well as the X showing where his bike was]

Pee-wee: Showroom Q: a scale-model of the entire mall! X marks the scene of the offense. These arrows here bear witness the exact position of the dominicus at the hour of the crime. Jupiter was aligned with Pluto! The moon was in the 7th...

Chuck: Pee-wee!

Pee-wee: Please save your questions until I'm THROUGH, Chuck!

Chuck: Well, when will that exist? A long time, we wait! We've been hither for over three hours at present, and I'thou not sure if any of the states tin see what all this is supposed to mean.

Pee-wee: Supposed to mean? Supposed to MEAN?

[breaks his pool cue]

Pee-wee: Large Marge sent me.

Trucker: Did yous say Large Marge?

Pee-wee: She but dropped me off.

Trucker: That's impossible. Large Marge? She's...

Human in Diner: It was ten years ago on a night just like this evening. Why, this evening'south the anniversary. Worst accident I ever seen.

Pee-wee: But that means the Big Marge I was riding with was...

All: Her ghost!

[Anybody is leaving Pee-wee'due south basement, only as Pee-wee goes on with his evidentiary coming together]

Dottie: Pee-wee, let's become up and get some fresh air, alright?

Pee-wee: What for?

Dottie: Considering information technology'southward hot in here.

Pee-wee: Hot? Who's hot? Feels only fine to me.

[sarcastically]

Pee-wee: I feel but PERFECT! In fact, I can't remember when I felt quite then COZY downward here!

Dottie: Pee-wee, I call up I tin get Chuck to give you a skilful break on one of the bikes in the shop.

Pee-wee: I don't want some other crappy wheel!

Dottie: Well, Pee-wee, listen, if you desire my assist...

Pee-wee: [shouting] I DON'T want your help! I don't demand the police and I DON'T Demand Yous!

[screaming]

Pee-wee: I DON'T NEED ANYBODY!

Mr. Buxton: [after Pee-wee and Francis wrestle in the bathtub and Pee-wee is trying to open a window] Pee-wee, Pee-wee! What is going on hither?

Pee-wee Herman: He's a thief! He stole my bike!

Francis: Yous liar! I swear I didn't do it, Dad!

Mr. Buxton: Pee-wee, this is a serious allegation. Do you have whatsoever proof?

Pee-wee Herman: Well, not exactly.

Mr. Buxton: Pee-wee, the Buxtons are not thieves. Just look at him.

[Francis gives a sad puppy face up]

Mr. Buxton: He couldn't accept stolen your bike. He hasn't left this business firm since yesterday. We've been setting upwardly Francis' birthday plans all day.

Pee-wee Herman: Gee, I judge I was incorrect. We don't have to involve the government in this matter, practise we, Mr. Buxton? Information technology was an honest mistake, and I'chiliad very lamentable.

Mr. Buxton: Well... I yet recollect you lot should apologise to Francis, and then I want to see the two of you shake hands.

Pee-wee Herman: I'm sorry, Francis.

[Shakes his paw, and reaches for his play tricks gum]

Pee-wee Herman: Here, would you care for some mucilage?

[Francis takes a piece of fox gum]

Pee-wee Herman: Would yous like some, Mr. Buxton?

Mr. Buxton: Oh, thank you.

Pee-wee Herman: Spearmint or fruit?

Mr. Buxton: Uh, fruit please.

[Takes a slice of trick gum]

Pee-wee Herman: [leaving] Well... goodbye!

Mr. Buxton: Goodbye.

Francis: You do believe me, don't you lot, Dad?

[as Francis chews the spearmint trick gum, the saliva in his oral cavity turns black. Mr Buxton screams as he realizes his own fruit fox gum is spicy]

Radio DJ: [Pee-wee goes to a radio station to post a $10,000 reward for the recovery of his bike] Well, that is some story Pee-wee and with the kind of reward money you're offering, I'm sure a lot of our listeners volition be searching.

Pee-wee: Oh, my name'due south engraved on the back of the seat. That'due south Pee-wee Herman. P-E-E,

Francis: [turns off radio] That does it! He simply won't allow up. I changed my mind. I don't want the stupid cycle anymore.

Francis' Accomplice: Well, a deal'south a deal. So... fork over my money for lifting it for you lot... Buxton!

Francis: [Pays his friend] Hither. Take the bike with you. Only go rid of it.

Francis' Cohort: [Takes some more money from Francis] That'll cost you lot extra. Meet yous subsequently sucker!

Pee-wee: Go ahead and scream your head off! Nosotros're miles from where anyone can hear you!

Pee-wee: I know you are, merely what am I?

Pee-wee: [Knocks on the door to Francis' business firm and his butler comes to the door] I wanna see Francis.

Butler: Francis is busy.

Pee-wee: Busy doing what?

Butler: Busy having his bath.

Pee-wee: Really, where are they hosing him down?

[the Butler slams the door, and Pee-wee knocks on it once more, and the Butler answers again]

Pee-wee: Me once again.

[showtime lines]

Pee-wee: Wait out, Mister Tater Head!

Pee-wee: There's a lotta things almost me you don't know annihilation almost, Dottie. Things you wouldn't empathize. Things you couldn't sympathise. Things you lot shouldn't understand.

Pee-wee: The mind plays tricks on yous. Y'all play tricks back! It'south like yous're unraveling a big cablevision-knit sweater that someone keeps knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting...

[At a life-size diorama in the Alamo]

Tina: This is i of my personal favorite parts of the tour. Please say how-do-you-do to our residents, Pedro and his wife Inez. Inez is holding a dirt pot that she seems very proud of. She has carefully detailed it with lots of paint and coat. And Pedro is working on an "adobe." Can you say that with me? "Adobe".

[Bout group responds, "Adobe."]

Simone: [in French] Ah! Pee-Wee! Haha! C'est magnifique! Voici Pierre.

Pierre: Bonsoir.

Pee-wee: Ditto. Here, brought yous guys French Fries! Hahaha!

Simone,Pierre: [together] Merci beaucoup, Pee-Wee!

Pee-wee: Merci-bleh-bleh!

P.W. Herman: [is handed the desk-bound phone] Aye? Uh-huh. Yeah, I sympathise.

[hangs upwardly]

P.W. Herman: That was the president again. I've got to steal back the X1 before the Soviets find the secret compartment containing the microfilm. The future of the free globe is riding on this one.

Mickey: [comes out of the window of a prison bus later seeing the start part of Pee-wee's pic] Great then far, Pee-wee. Action-packed!

Pee-wee Herman: [easily Mickey his refreshments] 1 soda. I human foot-long.

Policeman #ii: Hold it.

[he sees a small metal file and picks information technology out of the footlong]

Mickey: Expert endeavour, Pee-wee.

Pee-wee Herman: Look, Mickey!

Mickey: [after seeing a scene in the movie with Pee-wee] Wow! That'due south fantastic, Pee-wee!

Pee-wee Herman: Thanks!

Thug in aisle: [Seeing Pee-Wee walking in the alley] Hey, man. You lot're new to this turf! Nosotros don't take kindly to strangers coming 'circular here!

[Pee-Wee hisses]

Thug in alley: Ah! Run!

Tina: There are thousands and thousands of uses for corn, all of which I volition tell you well-nigh correct now.

Pee-wee Herman: [28:15] Exhibit D. Jimmy! What is this? Too late! Chip!

Chip: Uh, looks similar a pen.

Pee-wee Herman: Exactly! I bought this pen 1 hour before my bike was stolen. Why? What'due south the significance? I don't know!

Mr. Buxton: Francis, we are breaking the door down now!

Mr. Buxton: [shouting] Francis, what'southward going on in in that location?

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Source: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089791/quotes/qt0339772